wtf?

starting to think my 'sickness' is more mental then physical, except i dont know the cause of it ahahah weird yeah? xP

Sick :(

Sigh the past week, I've been feeling like shit :( everytime I eat, my stomach seems to be rejecting the food to the point where I want to throw up T.T I get this bloated feeling and I don't even eat much. I still get the hungry feeling but I don't feel like eating cos I feels like I've got something stuck in my throat. Last time I felt like this was when my ex broke up with me but I'm pretty sure I'm not depressed right now ahaha maybe I'm stressed, but I dunno about what lmao. When anything related to food becomes a problem for me then you know shit is going down ahaha

Mum put me on a diet, can't eat anything but congee and light things :( fml T.T

On clouds :D

Target locked and acquired. Name obtained. Initiate step 2 ;D

AHAHAHAHA xD uni party was hell worth it :D

:)

hello hello my darlings :)
how about a little bed time story? ahahahh xP just a quick update, little rants about things bothering me and just stuff going on in my life in general :)

so these days i've been reading quite a bit, which i guess is good, ahaha better then sitting at the computer and watching dramas or playing games right? xP i might go to my library to borrow books, expect i think i owe them like $30 from over due books last time so i dont really wanna go back keke xP work is same old work, still tiring, my hours vary, some weeks i only work approx 15hours or so and some weeks i work around 22ish. but hey its $$$$ xP trying very hard to save up since i saved up shit since i started working over the holidays and i earned a lot....i mean A LOT ahaha so yeah. mum always says myer is smart to hire people like me cos we spend our pay checks back on their clothes anyways lmao xP

Uni is starting to get hard to follow and its only the end of the 2nd week.....oh boy :( better start writing up notes and revising before i leave it cramped up in the last week before exams ahaha speaking of uni, i found a new target ;D its not as starkerish as it sounds....ok maybe pretty stalker, but hey going some research before i go for it? AHAHAHA xP theres actually many new good looking before at my uni :) something to look forward to aye? ;D

so i've been hearing a lot things from people the past few weeks, and some it is just ridiculous. Im sick of narrow minded people, who only see themselves and think they're right, and what makes it worst? they think they know you. hey unless you think, feel and see exactly like me, dont act like you know everything about me. You have you're own opinions, and i respect that, but dont try to enforce you're thoughts on me lmao. Also accusing me of something, that i never did or intended, is just fked up and going around spreading it is even more fked up. But then again, nowdays i dont really give a shit, how people see me, as long as my close friends accept me for who i am, doesn't matter what other people think. Wish i matured earlier, thinking back in the days, i was really self-concious of myself, always worried about what people thought, tried to copy the 'cool' stuff, ahhhh what a naive child i was.

Things have changed a lot for me since back in high school and stuff, then we'll have big groups of friends that we always hung out together, but nowdays, i only see/talk to close friends, that have made it through everything and kept in contact with me, the rest have just kind of drifted off. I guess i still do hang out with my groups, but normally only when theres a special occasion like a birthday or something then again, alot of them dont invite me out anymore, although i cant really blame them, after all i was always busy in the holidays due to work and now that uni has started i dont have time anyways. :)

as usual my blogs never make sense ahaha its just rant rant rant to no one in particular xP. good way to express yourself without someone talking back ahaha so thats about it, going to read a bit then sleep and head to the gym tomorrow, did i mention, that all the new good looking people are fit as well? ahaha more motivation i guess xP

goodnights my dears <3 :)

leave me the fk alone.

No title

Hello my darlings :)

Just thought I'll drop by. No one else to talk to cos I'm lonely ;) ahaha
So many changes have happened in my life since uni started, for one, juggling uni and work is hard and tiring. Then I have to fit in a bit of free time and gym here and there. Sigh. Not having time for anything else doesn't help the fact that I already feel distant from everyone :( I dunno why :(

Feeling a mixed of moods right now. So yeah, I'm ranting yet again. Ahaha
Oh reccently, couples have developed from our circle of friends. Just feels so different considering I'm not exactly a fan of couples from sane circle of friends, just brings trouble when shit goes down. But hell, I'm not the one in the relationship so I guess it doesn't matter. :) oh and I find girls who have no trust in their bfs and get jealous over things stupid, vice versa with the guys as well. Don't care if I sound like a bitch, you're just asking for an happy relationship by worrying and doubting everything. maybe this is just all a rant from a lonely single girl who's jealous of people in relationships...nahh don't thing so xP

But yeah, hope the new couples all the best. Dont cause trouble cos that drags the rest of the group down ahaha xD

Yup that's about it, I'm going to sleep with hopes to hit the gym tomorrow xD *fingers crossed*
goodnight my dears 

hello again :)

so my blog has been delayed by 1 week since i got back from port stephens. i suppose i should of made a update when i got back but i've just been too lazy ahahah

so i have good news and bad news and more rants xP
good news is i got to keep my job at myer, so it means for the mean time, im still employed ahaha which is good :) although i should really try for like woolies or coles, spend less money that way, i spend so much working at myer, cos i get to see the first sale offers and get my staff discount on top of that lmao. also i got my timetable today, relatively happy about it, expect for my 8am starts on mondays, wish i was able to change it earlier, by the time i got home from work to customise it, i was still stuck with a 8-6 day on mondays. but overall, my longest break is 3 hrs, which is good considering last sem i had like 6 hour breaks sometimes. now that was shit. im also looking forward to starting uni again, got nothing better to do. also makes me get out of the house so i have a excuse to go to the gym ahaha xP

here comes the bad news, well for me, what happens when your best friend tells you shes moving away 2 days before she leaves? during the 2nd last day at port stephens she told me she was going ANU to study (which is in canberra), i was really sad when she told me, cos she had thought about it for awhile, and she was leaving for vietnam the day after we got back from ps, which mean i pretty much wasn't going to see her again, until the easter breaks. At first i tried to convince her not to go and i started crying, which was the reason she didnt want to tell me, cos it would make it harder for her to leave. i felt a sudden stab of guilt, wishing i had been nicer to her during the week we were up at port stephens. But i know its selfish of me to try convince her not to go, its her life, and i guess she can always come back during holidays or i go up to her. Plus she really needs to get away from sydney so i told her to go, and that i would be fine without her since we barely even saw eachother when during uni last year anyways. Only difference is she isn't a phone call away now, cant meet up with her when im sad, lonely or happy about something. i just hope she doesn't eat instant noodles everyday or something, the girl doesn't know how to cook and here she is moving out by herself. so worried about her ahahah shes at the age where she should be able to start looking after herself anyways :) guess ill have to rant and reply more on my blog now ahahah. With her leaving, i feel like im even more deperate to get a bf now ahaha xP so im not that lonely when she leaves. sigh my sad lonely life LMAO

ohhh and my port stephens trip :) it was fun ahaah, i was pretty much the only one who stayed sober and un-stoned. now they all call me 'mum' since i was looking after them ahaha. so i have more 'children' now, not like i didn't have enough before. we had 10 people in our house and our other group of friends had 8, the cool thing was their house was on the same street as us, so it was only a 1minute drive to get to their place ahaha the weather wasn't exactly shit, sunny during the morning and day, then cloudy towards the evening, which was good cos i didn't want to get sunburnt or turn like 5 shades darker xP funny cos me and my friend brough a massive umbrella and if we werent in the water we were under it ahaha xP being pretty much the only girls from the trip, we cared about our skin alot more then the boys ahaha on the way back, my car overheated, so we had to stop at a friends place and refil the water + let it cool down. pretty funny experience ahaha, full had the car rolling on neutral whenever we could to avoid heating it up more. OHHHH and also my friend taught me how to drive manual, i have the basics, just need to get the hang of it now, and do it smoothly.

im planning to get a manual car since they're cheaper and more fuel efficient, but i have to wait till i get my green Ps, which is in june so yeah. right now im car hunting although im set on getting a mazda 3 sedan, sp25 would have been my ideal choice but its still pretty expensive for a 2nd hand one, so i guess that leaves neo or sp23. either way mazda 3 sedan in gunmetal ♥♥

group picture - minus a friend who was knocked out at home xP

think ill call it a night, plan is to craw into bed and watch family outing :) havnt written a blog this long in awhile, gonna publish it before i lost it all xP happened before ahahah
so goodnights my dears :) see you next time :D

memories

so its been awhile and this is prob my first blog since the new years ahahah havnt been doing much except working and spending money LMAO but technically chinese new years was only few days ago so it wasn't THAT long ago xD

so i went to a party yesterday which brought back memories cos we pretty much did the exact same thing they did for their party last year which was dinner and hotel except this time plus clubbing cos we're big girls now ;D ahahahah but there was also one person there that i had used to be really close with but some how we drifted ahahah and during the party i couldnt help but think....'what happened between us?'. we dont really talk anymore and we act like strangers ahahah to make it worst my bestie made it evenn more awkward between us at the club == sigh. i realised that it was exactly 2 years ago when we had something going on ahahah wow long is that? fk time passes fast.

so this is really just a meaningless blog. with me ranting as usual about shit thats not important ahahah xP on a second note IM GOING PORT STEPHENS IN ONE WEEEK. WOOOT WOOOTTT. ahahah my first road trip :D theres so much shit going now that i wanna get out of sydney ahahah

and by shit i mean, friend's relationship going down the drain, previous problems that i thought were solved have surfaced again, needing to find a new job and pretty much all those other little stressful things in life ahahah (first world country problems right there ;P )

so its 4am and it doesnt feel like it since i woke up at 7pm after chucking a all-nighter at the hotel and i have a sore throat so maybe i should attempt to sleep before i become a fatty and go fulfill my hunger lmao
so goodnights darlings...or good morning :D